Tales of the Belligerent Gay Driver.

Last Time we left our hero (BGD) he was busy screaming at a stupid Carmel housewife who blithely cut across 3 lanes of traffic to turn left against the light.

We now join him as he drives home.

So I went to my mothers tonight to 1. finally get my hair cut and 2. take my mom out for dinner. For those who don't know I have only had three people in my life cut my hair. Once in Florida because the drive home to have my mother do it would have been like 20 hours, one way. The second time was I needed to get it cut for a wedding and I didn't have time to go home. Before you go thinking that is weird my mother is a beautician so it isn't really that weird. I keep my hair short and about every 3 weeks I get it cut but it has been like 3 months since my last cut, so I was very shaggy.

The hair was cut the dinner had and so I start on my drive home. Most of the way was fine, until I was merging onto 69, the interstate not the position. When the guy in front of me starts to break and slow down to 42 miles an hour. Ok, the speed limit is still 55 but I think he will speed up when we it the interstate, no in fact he slows down because a whole line of semi's are coming up on the left so of course I try to be patient and gently move up closer so he gets the hint that the speed limit is now 65. Nope no hint taken and now I have all the cars behind me zooming around to form a parade on my left. At this point I am irritated to say the least. So fly around him when I get the chance honk and put a finger out the window. I am pretty sure he missed it because it was dark and well he's a fuctard. (No spellcheck word for that either)

So now I am at a comfortable cruising speed and now off the interstate and on Binford and some bitch flies up my ass, and sits there. doesn't get around just sitting with her high beams up my trunk like she paid for the lobster herself. So of course I do the only thing I can do. Slowly pass cars and then speed up till the next car and slow back down. When she finally maneuvers around I tailgate her. Yes I am aware this is how I am going to die.

This has been another installment of Belligerent Gay Driver.


I need like a theme song or a montage of me wide mouthed and giving the one finger salute.

Not my hand but you get the idea.