Parties,Parties,Parties

Tis the Season and we have hit full swing. Last weekend was one side of the families Christmas and this weekend there are three festivities going on. None of them are close and convienent to me or each other. The first was last night and it's distance wasn't bad. Tonight the first party is way south of the city about 30-40 minutes the second party is north of the city about 20-30 minutes. Good times.

Last night was an annual trek to my friends J&J's, gay couple with a great house. I must say I am completely jealous of their place. They every year have a white elephant party. I have to say my experiences with white elephants are very bad my moms family does one and when I was 19 I said no more because that year I received a fish plate. Not a plate that you serve fish on but a glass plate that looked like a carp. Of course no one would steal that from you. What made it really bad I could have looked passed the fact that it was a hidious piece of serving ware but it was in it's original box and the plate was still dusty. The box had been torn and repaired in several places with masking tape and the box had a thick layer of dust covering it. Are you kidding me?!? Also in that same year I witnessed a cousin unwrap a box of trash, literally a box of someones trash. Merry Christmas, I hope you like crap. In these situations I always bring very nice gifts and I always steal something nice. I never unwrap anything, especially with this group of people. You never know when you will find a dildo or a remote control for the blind with 1 inch squared buttons. I think this years best was a toy polar bear that poops brown jelly beans. I personally walked away with a set of four Vera Wang lead crystal high ball glasses. Never pick an unopened gift.

Well tonight a party with the Ex-wife and then on to a party where last year we left a ham sandwich in the Christmas tree. I have no idea why we ever get invited to these places again.